


Sing me to sleep

by pupshori



Category: Sexy Zone
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Drama, M/M, Romance, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-14
Updated: 2018-09-16
Packaged: 2019-02-02 00:51:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 17,555
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12716373
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pupshori/pseuds/pupshori
Summary: Kento is a nerdy college student who doesn't like partying and loves his dog but yearns for the romance of his life. Fuma on the other hand is a motorbike enthusiast who loves performing at parties and lives life on the edge but is scared of facing his past. The two of them couldn't lead more different lives, yet there is something crucial that connects and forces them to cross paths.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> /sips on iced coffee/ I need sleep but here I am with another FumaKen AU! story. This will probably be dumb and so OOC but somehow I wanted to try writing something mystery/action/drama-like with badass rebel Fuma for a long time now.

                                                         

 

 

„Why would I go to a stupid party?!“, Kento says as he crosses his arms in form of protest and leans back on his cafeteria chair. „People only go to make out and dance to shitty club music and drown their worries in alcohol.“

„And like you sitting at home with a bottle of red wine cuddling your dog and telling her how she’s the only love of your life is any different?“, his best friend Shori retorts as he takes a sip of his coke.

They sit in the cafeteria of their university, with their food and a few books on the table. Nothing unusual for two young students. It’s afternoon and they still have some classes left. Other people around them chatter with each other just like them, wasting their break away.

„First of all, her name is Bonita, and second of all she _is_ the only love of my life. What are you even talking about? Of course that’s way different!“

Kento looks at Shori with an angered face expression but Shori knows Kento just cannot stay mad at anyone, not even at his two years younger junior. He’s just too good of a soul.

„Yeah, yeah“, Shori snickers, then his tone gets serious all of a sudden. „Look, you’re always just studying or working. You don’t participate in any student activities nor do you go to any events or parties. Now as your friend I am forced to tell you that you’re overworking yourself and making yourself unhappy with that attitude of yours.“

„I’m not overworking myself, I just want good grades“, Kento defends himself.

„Oh, not just that, how dare I forget the times when you actually spare yourself some time to drink at home while watching a sappy movie and then you call me on the phone, crying about things like _oh Shori I’m so lonely I will die alone why don’t I have anyone by my side-..._ “

„I don’t sound like that!“ Kento instantly interrupts Shoris ridiculous imitation of his own self during a very desperate time. Or times. Shori is right he does have those times quite often lately.

„Okay, maybe, I did go overboard a little while I was tipsy.“

„Look, if you want to date, or find the love of your life, whatever, you need to go out and be around people. How else do you think you will ever achieve that? Surely not by sulking at home all day.“

„I know, you’re kinda right-...“, Kento wants to say but is cut off.

„I _am_ right, like usually“, Shori says with a smug smile as he shoves a piece of paper in front of Kento. „No seriously, I just want to help you a little. There’s a party at this cool club this weekend with great live music. You like music, right? A lot of cool people will be there. You should try to go and see what it’s like, no big deal.“

„That’s easy for you to say. You always drag Matsushima with you wherever you go but I’m by myself“, Kento says after he hastily throws a glance at the paper in front of him. It’s just a flyer with the location’s name and address in a cool-looking font.

„Come on, we will go as well so you won’t be completely alone, alright? It’s going to be fun“, Shori smiles and Kento rolls his eyes because he knows he cannot say no to his face anyways, then he proceeds to look out of the big glass windows next to them.

It’s drizzling outside and the sky is hidden by grey clouds. If Kento doesn’t do something about his situation, the feeling in his heart won’t change, just like the gloomy weather recently.

 

~~~~~

  
„What do you think? How do I look?“, Kento says to his reflection in the mirror in front of him while fixing his hair.

He’s sitting on a stool in front of the mirror in his room while listening to a cheesy pop song playing from his radio. He lives by himself and his pet dog in a tiny apartment and it’s almost too cozy inside to go out now and leave his comfort zone. But since he has already changed out of his sweatpants and has his hair done he might as well go through with it.

Bonita, his tea cup poodle that sits on the carpet next to him, barks in approval and Kento turns to her, bending down to pat her head.

„Thank you love.“ He smiles and picks her up into his lap to give her a cuddle and the little poodle barks again, snuggling against Kento’s warm skin with her tongue stuck out.

„I know, I know. I’ll have to leave you alone tonight. But I’ll come back soon! I already know the party will be boring anyways“, he sighs and puts her down on the carpet again. „Watch the apartment for me, okay?“

Bonita barks as if she agrees to protect it with her life. The little dog is barely noticeable by her size alone, that’s how tiny she is. Sometimes Kento feels the same. He’s not tiny, but he feels invisible to the world.

He doesn’t really have friends except for Shori who he went to high school together with. He doesn’t have any love interest either. All he’s good at is reading books and binge-watching romance series on Netflix while eating lots of ice cream.

Maybe it will be good if he goes out tonight so he can try and be less invisible.

 

~~~~~

 

When Kento arrives at his desired destination he doesn’t realise that it’s way too early. It’s not even eleven o’clock.

He hasn’t had problems finding the club although it is located in the smaller part of downtown near a pier. The club itself isn’t as big as he expected either and there aren’t many people there yet and most of them hang around near the bar. The DJ is playing a few simple beats with recently popular dance music from the charts and a couple is dancing carelessly on the dance floor.

 _Good, it’ll be easier to find Shori_ , Kento thinks to himself as he walks past a few small groups of people. He starts to sweat.

He feels like everyone is watching him although he knows they’re not. Like something will happen any second. _Stop being paranoid_ , Kento tells himself again, nervously going through his hair with one hand trying not to lock eyes with anyone.

He’s wearing a baby blue collar shirt tucked in his jeans, along with white Nike sneakers. Although he does look a little too proper compared to other people, he still looks good simply because he is pretty and has a gentle atmosphere around him.

Impatient, he plays with the sleeves of his shirt as he walks up to the bar and sits down on one of the stools. He orders a ginger ale and keeps looking around for Shori or his friend Matsushima but he cannot spot them anywhere.

„You here for the first time?“

Kento suddenly turns around to his left as he hears a female voice talk to him through the music.

„I asked, are you here for the first time?“, she asks again, leaning a little closer to Kento. „Your dress code doesn’t really fit in here. You look like you’re going to visit your girlfriend’s parents for the first time.“

She lets out a giggle but Kento doesn’t feel like laughing at all. However she does look different from him. She’s wearing a black low-cut t-shirt with a mini-skirt, torn up tights and leather boots.

„Yes uhm, I’ve never been here before. I’m waiting for a friend actually“, Kento replies.

„Oh. Friends of friends are always welcome here“, she says as she fiddles for something in her little clutch bag, then fishes out a lighter and a pack of cigarretes. „Want one?“

„No thanks, I don’t smoke“, Kento rejects and sighs. _What the hell did Shori get me into? And why isn’t he here yet?!_

„How cute“, she giggles as she lights a cigarette and takes a puff, Kento surprised at the sudden smoke in his face.

Kento doesn’t reply to that, just keeps on looking into his still almost full drink. They sit next to each other like that for a while and Kento hopes she realises how boring he actually is and looks for a better prey.

„What’s your name?“, she asks after they just sit in silence for a while.

„Nakajima Kento.“

„Kento huh. I’m Reina. You should come to the dance floor with me, there’s going to be cool live music in a minute.“

„I really don’t think-...“

„Come on!“

Before Kento is able to protest he is already dragged towards the crowd of people with his drink in his hand, Reina having grabbed his other wrist.

It is about to turn midnight soon and still no sight of Shori. Kento feels completely lost and out of place but he doesn’t run away. Not this time. He will at least pretend to have a good time and be social.

Suddenly the room turns even darker and the music stops for a moment. Headlights turn towards the small podium in front of them and Kento tries to look through the people in front of him.

„My dear ladies and gentlemen, I hope you’re all having a good time tonight!“, the DJ shouts through a microphone from the left side of the podium and the crowd hollers.

„Thank you all for coming. I don’t want to talk too much now because we have our usual amazing guest perform some live music for us, please give a kind welcome applause to Kikuchi Fuma.“

Kento turns around, still in hope of seeing his friends somewhere in between all the people, not caring about some unknown indie singer who is about to give a little live performance.

The mood changes suddenly as the guy in front starts to sing and even Kento finally turns back to look at him.

He is tall with dyed light-brown hair falling over his eyes and the headlights shade perfectly bringing out the contours of his handsome face. He’s leaned against a bar stool with a guitar on his knee and a leather jacket around his shoulders, carefully playing the tune of a warm-sounding love song. But it isn’t that which catches Kento’s attention.

It’s his voice.  

_„I never knew you were the someone waiting for me.“_

It’s like Kento has heard it somewhere before. A popular singer perhaps?

_„Because we were just kids when we fell in love, not knowing what it was.“_

No, it is a cover song and the original singer sounds different. But this guy’s voice sounds much better. It is a perfect mix of raspy and soothing.

_„I will not give you up this time but darling, just kiss me slow, your heart is all I own.“_

It’s perfect.

Kento finds himself unable of doing anything but stare and listen. However he doesn’t pay attention to the lyrics either. That voice is mesmerising enough for Kento to blur everything else out even the fact that suddenly the headlights are shining directly above his head.

Suddenly the DJ’s voice interrupts Kento’s thoughts „Ohhh, looks like the magic headlights have chosen a lucky guy this time! Guess who will receive a kiss by the handsome Kikuchi Fuma tonight!“

Kento's eyes widen as the singer guy suddenly puts his guitar against the stool, gets up and walks directly towards him until he’s only a few inches away.

 _Wait what?,_  Kento thinks. _A kiss? What? He’s going to the girl next to me, right?_

It’s a silly fanservice game that happens in this club does once in a while, a cute singer performs a cute song and then walks over to the crowd (that consists of mostly girls anyways) and the headlights are being shone onto a random person who gets a quick kiss by the singer.

Kento feels all eyes on him and the girls next to him giggle in anticipation and he wants to run away but he’s so paralysed and he doesn’t know what to do so he just looks down to his drink when suddenly Fuma grabs his chin to make him look up, and before he realises it he feels a pair of plump lips on his own.

He kisses him.

It’s a very short kiss indeed but to Kento it feels like eternity. Getting kissed by a stranger hasn’t been on his list tonight but he definitely does not dislike it either.

Before Kento can move his legs or any other body part he does something out of shock and stupidity, maybe also fear but most importantly out of confusion.

He moves his hands up and somehow ends up spilling his ginger ale all over Fuma’s face and his white shirt, who jumps slightly at the liquid being splashed onto him.

The girls around them scream in shock and even Reina looks at Kento like he has lost his mind. Everything has been like a cute fanservice type of thing up until now, until Kento once again decides to do something stupid.

His eyes widen in shock again and Fuma doesn’t look amused as he wipes his face dry with the hem of his shirt.

„I’m- I’m sorry“, Kento mutters.

„Okay well“, the DJ laughs through the microphone before he continues, „sometimes accidents happen. Enough with the cheesy pop songs, we shall resume the night with more party songs, alright?“

The crowd dissolves on the dance floor again as loud dance music begins playing from the speakers.

„You’re coming with me“, Fuma suddenly hisses into the music and before Kento can comprehend he’s being grabbed by his wrist again and dragged off to somewhere.

Just as he’s about to catch his breath again he finds himself in the mens’ bathroom.

Fuma slams the bathroom door behind them and the music appears to trail off in the distance. Kento wants to turn around but before he can even process a single thought Fuma places his hand against the wall next to them, restricting Kento from escaping.

„What do you want?“, Kento blurts out and his face turns red. The close proximity between them just makes him sweat even more.

„It’s interesting that I run into you in this place exactly“, Fuma says with a smirk. „Nakajima Kento.“

„How do you know my name?“

„I know much more about you than you think.“

Kento doesn’t know if he should be creeped out or scared or intrigued but something about Fuma’s voice doesn’t make him want to push the taller away and them run off like he would usually do when in an uncomfortable situation.

The true scary thing is that he doesn’t feel uncomfortable.

„You really don’t remember, huh?“, Fuma says with disappointment in his voice. „Maybe I can help anyways.“

Kento keeps staring into his dark, lustful eyes and before he can register what’s happening Fuma leans in to kiss him again. This time for a longer, deeper kiss without a cheering crowd around them. They’re by themselves.

Kento’s mind goes blank. It’s like his body automatically gives in and he kisses back, just to see what is going to happen. It’s not like he hasn’t had relationships in the past either. But they have been different and something about Fuma is exciting because no matter who he tries comparing him to or tries to remember, he can’t do it.

It’s exciting, to kiss a stranger in a club bathroom. A singer with a beautiful voice.

Kento thinks Fuma tastes like smoke mixed with alcohol but his tongue feels warm and inviting and he kisses him so perfectly. It almost feels like Kento is on some aphrodisiac, it makes his body ache with lust and all his worries go away.

„Maybe I know how you can make up for ruining my shirt“, Fuma whispers against Kento’s lips as he breaks off the kiss and Kento looks at him like a deer caught in headlights and just when he is about to ask _How?,_ Fuma grabs his shoulders and pushes him against the wall behind them.

Fuma presses his body into him right away and slightly rolls his hips, Kento biting his lips to hold back a moan. He leaves little kisses not just on Kento’s mouth but on his cheek, his jawline, his neck and right below his ear, and Kento can’t help but feel aroused.

„I missed you so much“, Fuma groans against his skin before he carefully bites into it, creating a small love mark and Kento yelps finally, his body so sensitive because he’s been deprived of any touches for so long.

Kento doesn’t know what to do with his hands so he places them at Fuma’s chest and gently pushes him away so he can look at his face, trying to figure out what is going on between them.

„You know, I don’t do stuff like this usually“, Kento says and his voice sounds so low he doesn’t even know if Fuma hears him.

„Don’t worry, I have condoms“, Fuma replies with a laugh.

That laugh. It’s like a melody in Kento’s head.

„I didn’t mean that“, Kento instantly retorts and he blushes even harder than before. „But we should get you out of this wet shirt before we do anything else. I don’t want to be responsible if you catch a cold.“

In truth, Kento just doesn’t want this to continue in a shabby bathroom stall where anyone is able to walk in on them.

Fuma snickers. „What’s your solution, Mr. smartypants?“

„If you want we can go to my place? I’ll wash your shirt and give you a new one. Seems like we wear a similar size.“

„Sounds fair to me“, Fuma says as he pecks Kento’s cheek one more time before he grabs his wrist and drags him out of the bathroom again.

He puts on his leather jacket and Kento his sweater as they walk out of the club and the cold night air hits them. It’s so silent outside it almost sounds peaceful and since they’re close to the pier, Kento hears the sound of train ferries and the ocean in the background.

He still cannot believe what he’s doing. A day ago he wouldn’t even dare to go out by himself and now he’s bringing a guy home, not to forget a very good-looking, fierce guy who smells like ginger ale now and Kento can’t help but smile a little.

There is something about Fuma that doesn’t make him want to let go even if that means getting hurt in the future. That maybe, this is the right time for an adventure. The right time to let himself fall.

It is the right time to listen to his heart.

„Are you coming?“, Fuma shouts from a few metres away and Kento realises he is spacing out.

He sees Fuma stand next to a motorcycle, a black Yamaha R-6 to be exact, put on a helmet and leather gloves all the while he's not breaking eye contact with Kento.

„I thought you didn’t want me to catch a cold, so hurry“, Fuma says as Kento finally stands in front of him, unsure if he should look at Fuma or the bike. „Take this and get on the back.“

Kento is handed a second helmet and he only stares at it for a few seconds like he doesn't know how to wear it. „I can’t believe I’m doing this. This is so irresponsible!“

„I guess this is too much coolness for you to handle“, Fuma jokes and climbs his bike as he grabs onto the hand clutch.

Kento rolls his eyes and decides to let this comment slide but eventually sits behind Fuma, holding onto the seat.

„You better hold onto me because this baby goes pretty fast“, Fuma says as he puts his shield down and starts his machine.

The sound of the engine makes Kento jump slightly and he instantly wraps his arms around Fuma’s waist to cling onto him the best he can. He has never before been on a motorcycle but he can’t help but feel a little excited about that. It might sound strange but Fuma gives off a very protecting feeling.

„You ready?“, Fuma asks but before Kento can answer Fuma already starts riding off, which makes Kento just hold onto him even tighter.

Kento tells Fuma his address and guides him as they ride through downtown Tokyo. There’s city lights everywhere around them and although this city never quite sleeps and there’s a lot of noise pollution, Kento cannot hear anything besides his own heartbeat hammer through his chest.

He gently lies his head on Fuma’s shoulder from behind, his grip becoming a little tighter. He sees the flashy colourful billboards pass him by in the blink of an eye as they rush across the motorway. It’s not packed since it’s way past midnight but Kento is still fascinated about how many cars they leave behind.

Kento knows they’re almost there when he hears the last train come in at the train station near his apartment and the familiar jingle plays from the speakers a little further away.

Fuma slows down in speed as he turns left into a more narrow street and Kento points at the apartment complex building in front of them, telling him that there is where he lives.

When they get to the fourth floor and Kento finally puts the key into his apartment door to open, it is already past two in the morning.

Everything is dark outside and Fuma kisses him on the doorstep to his home and Kento kisses him back just as eagerly as he throws his arms around Fuma’s neck.

Kento is practically glued to Fuma’s body as he feels his tongue in his mouth and suddenly it feels so very hot, so as soon as he manages to open the door with shaky hands and excitement, Fuma starts stripping their jackets off and throws them somewhere randomly as he looks around quickly, the bedroom on his mind.

The apartment is small and they find themselves in the main living space with the connected kitchen and balcony. Kento likes his bedroom but he shares it with Bonita and he would rather not wake up his pet dog in the middle of the night.

„Not the bedroom“, Kento whispers in between the kisses, like he’s able to read his mind. „Couch. Living room.“

„Why? Are you hiding some stack of weird porn from me?“

„Can’t you just shut up for once?“

„Someone’s excited tonight“, Fuma teases playfully and tugs on Kento’s shirt.

„Maybe“, Kento purrs. „But it looks like you are, too.“ He looks down and blushes as he notices the obvious tent that has been growing in Fuma’s jeans.

Before Fuma replies, Kento shoves him towards his two-seater couch and makes him sit down on it. Smiling sweetly, he chews his bottom lip as he slowly slides down on Fuma. Although Fuma prefers to be the one in control, Kento thinks Fuma’s face is turning into a cute shade of red but he cannot really tell with only the moonlight shining upon them.

Suddenly feeling very brave, Kento places his free hand on Fuma’s breastbone and slides it down his front until he reaches the waistband of his pants. Fuma jumps a little and lets out a short groan of surprise when Kento trails his fingers over the growing bulge.

„I thought you said you don’t usually do this?“ Fuma leans his forehead against Kento’s and he can feel his breathing on his flustered face.

„Maybe there are some things you don’t know about me after all.“ Kento smiles sheepishly and cranes his neck to the side so that he can nibble at his earlobe and suddenly a shuddery breath escapes Fuma’s lips.

Two can play at that game.

In response Kento slowly moves to straddle his hips, moving his face downwards to kiss his neck. He slides his hands back up his torso and caresses his shoulders in his palms. Fuma’s shoulders feel so damn good to touch, and Kento expresses this as his teeth gently graze the skin of his neck.

Suddenly Kento feels Fuma’s hands on his lower back as he pulls him closer, and Kento pushes his hips against Fuma’s crotch to let him know he’s as aroused as him as he reaches to grab the hem of his shirt. Noticing this, Fuma grabs Kento’s hands in his, halting his actions.

Kento pulls back to look at his face.

It feels like he’s looking into a mirror. Fuma’s eyes are blazing with desire and he stares at Kento for a long time, scanning for any trace of insecurity, but he won’t find any because Kento wants to do this so badly it almost scares him. All he thinks about right now is that he wants Fuma so much. His eyes seem to communicate this effectively as Fuma slowly breaks into a fiendish smile.

Before Kento has a chance to think, Fuma’s tongue is invading his mouth again. Fuma still tastes like alcohol and cigarettes but that’s okay as long as he’s kissing him. Kento kisses back and moans in reply as Fuma’s hands reach round to squeeze at his bottom as he resumes to tug on his shirt.

When Kento is finally done taking his shirt off, Fuma instantly flips him onto his back and pounces on top of him, pinning him down on the couch against the cushions as their lips meet once again. Kento’s fingernails dig into Fuma’s shoulders as he straddles his hips and slides his hand up Kento’s inner thigh. When it reaches the top, Fuma’s lips curl into a smile against his, and Kento hisses and throws his head back as Fuma experiments with fondling his bulge.

It feels like Kento has waited forever for those fingers to touch him and he enjoys it so much already but there is something missing to fulfil his satisfaction.

Kento breaks off the kiss to drop a subtle hint. This is not his first time, he doesn’t see the point in Fuma handling him like he’s made of porcelain. „You know, you don’t have to be... that gentle.“

Fuma frowns, then gets what he means and laughs aloud as he plays along. „So, the good boy next door likes it a little rough, hm?“

Kento nods a little too enthusiastically. „I love it.“

Laughing again, Fuma strokes his fingers through locks of dark brown hair as he firmly grinds himself down on Kento’s body.

„How much do you love it?“

„So much that I could keep doing it all night.“

„Well then, if you insist...“

Kento winces as Fuma grabs a handful of his hair and roughly yanks his face to his. He kisses him hard enough to draw the breath from his lungs, biting down on his lip until a familiar coppery taste fills his mouth. Fuma continues the stroking and then slides his hand underneath Kento to grip his butt, firmly pulling him closer and Kento shudders and moans under his actions, cupping the back of his head in his hands to increase the pressure of the kiss and buck his hips into Fuma’s.

Very soon all their remaining clothing are removed and thrown somewhere to the floor where they aren’t a bother anymore. The room suddenly turns very hot and the atmosphere steamy and Kento cannot believe the pleasure he’s feeling.

They both enjoy the night for the next few hours and forget everything else but themselves.

Fuma can’t believe he’s missed out on seeing Kento’s face like this for so long.

~~~~~

 

_Anywhere, anytime,_

_I would do anything for you._

This voice.

Kento has his eyes closed, he’s about to drift off to sleep with Fuma’s arms wrapped around him but he can hear this voice sing to him.

Fuma’s voice singing him to sleep. The melody so soft and gentle, so familiar and yet so new, it’s like a lullaby to his ears.

He knows this voice.

A voice he wouldn’t be able to ever forget.

_Anything for you._


	2. Chapter 2

__

 

 

_8 years ago_

Kento knows Fuma from when they went to Middle School.

It’s around the time Kento is a normal growing boy going through puberty, like everyone else. The only thing on his mind back then being football practise, his school grades and prepubescent issues. Nothing unusual.

He is walking home from school that winter day, it has started becoming dark very early already. Kento has to admit that his way home was a little scary and even though he is sure 15-year-old boys shouldn’t be scared of the darkness, he kind of is.

He is about to reach the street where he lives with his parents when suddenly he notices three tall guys surrounding a shorter one. The one in the middle, who looks like their leader, is wearing a snapback and a hoodie over his head. The left one is smoking and the right one has his hands in his pockets. They all look like they’re looking for trouble.

The shorter guy just looks at his feet, doesn’t even dare to look up at them. Kento recognises him, kind of. They’re in the same school and he’s Kento’s junior but he always sees him sit by himself in the school yard and not talk to anybody.

„Hey, we know who you are“, the guy in the middle says and steps forward. Although Kento’s reflexes tell him to step back from the situation he is glued on the spot.

„You’re Kikuchi’s son. Your daddy has a lot of money, you know? How about you give some to us?“

„I don’t have any money with me“, Kento hears the shorter guy say. Kento doesn’t even know his name but he doesn’t like where this conversation is going.

„I don’t like little liars like you“, the leader guy says and spits right into the shorter guy’s face.

And then finally Kento realises. This has been the first time he met Fuma. The first time Kento has heard that beautiful, although still young and breaking voice.

Kento knows he has to do something.

„Hey!“, Kento screams from over the footpath and rushes over to them, catching everyone’s attention. „Leave him alone and pick on someone your age!“

It seems like Fuma kind of knows him as well, having seen him at the school yard, the boy who is a year older than himself. He thinks all people know about him. Kento, the popular guy who plays football, gets good grades, who has all the girls secretly swoon over him behind his back.

„Move baby, why are you interfering? We know what we’re doing. This guy deserves it“, the right guy says and grips Kento’s shoulders as he smirks. „You don’t want us to demolish that pretty face of yours, right?“

Without hesitation Kento raises his fist and punches him. Right in the face.

That is the moment Fuma’s eyes widen in shock.

„How dare you-...!“

The sound of a hard slap is heard.

The guy has slapped Kento with so much force that blood is spilling on the concrete floor beneath him. „Playing hero, huh?! Who do you think you are, you spoiled brat!“

„Come on, we didn’t get here to beat up random kids. Let’s leave it be“, one of the other guys says.

„I don’t care. I just want to fuck him up so he knows when to shut his filthy mouth.“

Now Kento is the one surrounded by delinquent guys who almost forget that Fuma is standing only two metres away from them, watching the scene like he is in the middle of a movie.

Kento’s mind is running wild. One part tells him to protect Fuma, two middle schooler against three high schooler is still a big risk, plus they are the minority, but he should try.

Before he can even defend himself Kento gets another punch to his pretty face and he falls backwards to the ground. His head starts becoming dizzy and he doesn’t know if he should get up and strike back or just let it get over with. He knows they can easily overpower him.

„Enough now. We’re wasting time.“ The other guy again and the leader finally lets Kento alone.

„If you interfere again we won’t let you off that easily“, the leader spits and Kento crouches to his knees.

He watches them walk away and then holds his head in pain. Blood drops from his nose onto the ground again. Then he finally raises his head up and sees Fuma right in front of him.

„Why did you do that?“, Fuma asks with an angry face expression.

Their very first interaction.

„What?“

„Interfere. You’re stupid.“

„Is that all I’m going to get?“, Kento laughs, finally standing up and Fuma immediately rushes to his side to help him.

„I didn’t ask to be saved.“

„It was obvious that they would have done worse things to you, so maybe you could appreciate it at least a little“, Kento replies and fakes a smile not to worry the younger, then wipes his nose with his jacket’s sleeve.

„...Come with me, okay?“, Fuma mumbles, completely ignoring Kento’s previous complaints, and grabs Kento’s wrist to pull him along.

Kento doesn’t question him anymore but lets the younger guy drag him wherever he wants to, his head still aching. He can’t believe he has gotten into his first fight. He really wasn’t the type for that.

He realises Fuma brings him to a nearby convenience store, then makes him sit down on a bench in front of it.

„Sit here“, Fuma commands. „And don’t run away.“

Then Kento watches Fuma until he disappears into the store. He looks down onto his lap, his hands still shaky from the adrenalin rush. He doesn’t feel like going home now anyways. His strict and overly worried mother will be so furious upon seeing his face like this.

In less than a minute Fuma exits the store again with a small plastic bag in his hands and sits right next to Kento, their thighs almost touching.

Kento doesn’t know what’s happening when Fuma suddenly grabs his face to gently turn it to the side so he looks him directly in the eyes, but Kento remembers how red his cheeks must have turned. Fuma’s fingers graze over the bloody scratch on his left cheek and Kento jumps a little.

„Hold still“, Fuma mutters as he gets an anti-bacterial tissue and band-aid out of the bag, then proceeds to carefully wipe Kento’s injury with the tissue before putting the band-aid over it, Kento’s cheek stinging painfully in the meantime.

Kento still can’t process what’s happening and no one has ever been this kind to him before but for some reason he does’t flinch when the other guy touches him.

„T-thank you“, he stutters, not being able to find the right words.

„It’s my fault you got into this mess so it’s the least I can do“, Fuma replies casually and turns away again to look at nothing in particular. „And getting saved by a senior... It should be me saying thank you.“

Kento can barely hear the last part but he smiles at that. „What’s your name?“

„Kikuchi Fuma.“

„Fuma... nice to meet you!“, Kento beams. „My name’s Nakajima Kento.“

„I know“, Fuma replies, then blushes as he realises he just sounds like a creep. Of course he knows Kento. Everyone knows Kento. „I bought you a sandwich too. To say thank you properly.“

He hands Kento the bag and as Kento takes it, their hands touch for the first time. An innocent touch, however they both remember how warm that touch has felt on that winter day.

„You seem to have a lot of money to spend as a 14-year-old“, Kento laughs. „But how about we go somewhere else and share it? I know a cool hang out place not far from here.“

„I don’t know...“, Fuma hesitates.

„Come on, it’ll be fun! And you don’t know if these guys will be back to get you. If I’m around they won’t do anything.“

„...fine“, Fuma finally agrees but not because he’s scared of some delinquents.

It’s because he genuinely wants to spend some more time with Kento and get to know him.

A few moments later they end up at a shopping centre and they spend the whole day together, going through shops and looking at cool things they can’t afford. They pass by a pet shop and Kento squeals at the cute puppies in the shopwindow, then they stop by a candy shop where Fuma buys a bag of expensive candy for them to eat. Just normal things two teenage boys would do.

Eventually they sit down on a bench again near a water fountain, the water splashing against stone in the background. They’re both exhausted and Kento says he needs to lay down for a moment because his head feels like it’s going to explode.

Fuma sits straight up and lets Kento rest his head on his lap. It’s also the first time for Fuma, for someone to feel so comfortable around him. Maybe it’s the innocence of their childhood.

It is only five minutes but to Kento it feels like he is lying there for an eternity with his eyes closed, next to Fuma’s warm body. It is suddenly so silent and he’s finally able to block out the people around them.

_Anywhere, anytime,  
_

_I would do anything for you._

Fuma hums the melody of a song as he quietly sings to Kento. It’s so quiet and gentle and random Kento isn’t sure if he’s only imagining it. But not even in his mind would he be able to imagine such a beautiful soothing voice.

 _Anything for you._  
  
Now that he thinks back to this moment, it sounds like a promise.

~~~~

_Present time_

 

It’s Sunday morning when Kento opens his eyes again. The sun is shining through the curtains on his windows and he blinks a few times to get used to daylight.

He rubs the sleep out of his eyes, then realises that he’s squished on his couch with Fuma behind him, his arm casually lying over Kento’s waist and a light blanket over their naked bodies.

Kento carefully sits up, his back sore, then glances at Fuma who is lying on his side, face buried in one of the pillows. He can’t help but stare at Fuma’s sleeping form and think how vulnerable he looks right now, his chest moving slowly with the rhythm of his breathing.

Almost like back then when he was only a 14-year-old boy.

So different from the assertive and strong Fuma he is when he’s awake.

„Don’t stare at me like that“, Fuma grumbles into the pillow and Kento immediately looks away and shoots up from the couch.

„I finally remember why you know me“, Kento replies as he picks up his boxers and shirt from the floor to put on some clothes. „Kikuchi Fuma. The guy from Middle School who always attracted delinquents and only knew how to get in trouble.“

Fuma turns his head to look at him as soon as he mentions that. „Seriously?“

„Yeah.“

„Guess that punch to your head back then didn’t give you Alzheimers after all then“, Fuma snickers and Kento rolls his eyes. He can’t believe the things Fuma says sometimes and he wishes he could punch him instead.

Kento isn’t sure himself why he forgot about it. Things make a little more sense now and although Kento tries to make himself believe that it has been just a coincidence, he can’t bring himself around the thought that maybe this is more like fate.

„What happened back then?“, Kento asks curiously as he crouches down in front of Fuma. „When I graduated Middle School, you were suddenly gone. I mean, I know I went to High School but you suddenly stopped contacting me.“

„I had a few family problems back then and had to stop going to school for a while, so I didn’t have time for our cute meet ups. Sorry!“

Fuma just yawns and turns around in hope to get a little bit more sleep but Kento cannot shake off this worry on his mind because Fuma sounds like he’s hiding something from him.

Kento clears his throat. „I know we haven’t seen each other since back then but you can talk to me if there’s something...okay?“

Fuma ignores him and pretends to snore loudly when suddenly the doorbell rings, interrupting their both thoughts.

„Who’s that so early in the morning on a Sunday?“, Fuma mumbles in annoyance and finally sits up to ruffle his already messy hair.

„I don’t know. Maybe a neighbour has accepted a package for me while I was away or something like that“, Kento says as he walks over to the front door to get rid of the early disturber.

He doesn’t expect Shori to stand on the other side of the door with a worried face expression and a plastic bag in his hands that smells like fresh food.

„What are you doing here?!“, Kento asks as if he already forgot that his friend totally ditched him last night.

„I could ask you the same! Where have you been last night? We didn’t find you anywhere“, Shori retorts as he scans Kento from top to bottom, Kento then realises he’s only in his boxers and his shirt isn’t even buttoned up.

„Where I was? At this stupid party of course but you weren’t there“, Kento hisses but tries to keep his voice low.

„We thought you chickened out again and stayed at home so we didn’t look for you at first“, Shori explains calmly. „But then today morning I realised I gave you the wrong flyer and we went to completely different parties at different locations.“

„What?!“, Kento says through gritted teeth.

„I’m so incredibly sorry! This is why I bought lunch so we can eat together. To make amends for last night“, Shori replies and bows quickly, then gets distracted by some noise in the apartment and just as he peeks behind Kento, he sees Fuma leaning against the couch, still half-naked, waving at Shori with a cheeky smile. „But uhh, I see you had...fun last night?“

Kento turns around as quick as lightning and when he sees Fuma stand there like that, he immediately blushes and steps out to shove Shori to the side, leaving the door only slightly ajar.

„It’s not like that“, Kento whispers. „Actually we used to be friends in Middle School.“

„Of course“, Shori says with a wink and a witty undertone in his voice. „It was about time that you got laid. Here, have the food with your old, new-found boyfriend instead.“

Shori works part-time for KFC and eats fried chicken on a daily anyways, so Kento decides to take the plastic bags and just shoo him away for now. He has already embarrassed himself enough for today.

When Shori finally leaves for the elevator, Kento releases a long breath as soon as the door closes behind him again.

„Wow, KFC for breakfast!“, Fuma, who now at least put his shirt on again, yells as he licks his lips.

„It’s already 12:30PM, just saying.“

„It’s never too early for some fried chicken. Your friend works there?“

„Yeah, part-time.“

Kento gives up and rests the bags on the coffee table in front of Fuma who starts unpacking the food as his stomach growls. Kento doesn’t really feel like eating. He has so many questions still.

Boyfriend? Are they really? No, he’s sure for Fuma it was just a one-time fling. Kento doesn’t even know himself. He kind of knows Fuma but somehow he doesn’t at the same time. So much time has passed and they both have changed so much since back then, they’re not children anymore.

Kento just shakes his head.

„What are you thinking about?“, Fuma asks as he greedily bites into a chicken drumstick.

„You“, Kento replies instantly and doesn’t even realise how cheesy it sounds. „And what you were doing the past eight years. What you are doing now. Are you in college?“

„No“, Fuma answers with his mouth full of chicken. „But I bet you are.“

„It’s not about me.“

Kento wants to persist and bring more honest words than witty jokes out of Fuma but they’re both distracted by a certain barking coming from Kento’s bedroom.

„Oh she woke up“, Kento mumbles to himself and rushes over to open the door for his pet dog so she can come out and he can give her food. „Come Bonita, it’s time to eat something.“

Bonita barks again in response and her little fluffy tail wiggles in happiness as she follows Kento to the kitchen area where he fills up her pink bowl with dog food and refreshes her water.

„You have a puppy? How cute!“, Fuma beams and walks over to them just to talk to Bonita directly. „Can I pet you? You’re such a cutie aren’t you? Just like your owner.“

Fuma proceeds to pick her up and hold her in the air like a little baby as she completely ignores the food in front of her and gets excited since finally they’re having a new guest over to play with after such a long time. It slips away from Kento’s mind that Fuma just paid him a compliment too.

„Bonita is your name, huh? What a pretty name you have!“, Fuma coos in an overexaggerated baby voice and Bonita starts licking his hands, taking in all the new exciting smells and tastes around her. The little poodle looks even smaller in Fuma’s hands and Kento can’t help but smile at the way Fuma cares for Bonita so gently and lovingly.

He has to stop himself from imagining Fuma doing exactly the same to him one day later on.

„What inspired you to name her Bonita?“, Fuma asks as he brings the poodle even closer to his face to bury his nose in her soft fur.

„My Spanish class at college“, Kento laughs. „Bonita means _beautiful_ in Spanish. Like, when you want to tell a girl she’s beautiful. She’s a girl.“

„Oh. You didn’t change at all“, Fuma comments while facing Bonita still and sits down on a wooden chair next to him. „You’re still the old overachiever who’s world revolves around school and studying.“

„You get good grades and a good job later on in life by working hard from the beginning, it’s as simple as that“, Kento replies and crosses his arms, feeling a little insulted that Fuma always made fun of him for that. „It wouldn’t harm you if you tried doing that as well.“

Fuma pretends like he doesn’t hear that and keeps on whispering sweet nothings towards Kento’s dog as he pets her. He doesn’t even register the ringing of his own mobile phone and Kento rushes over to where the sound is coming from, probably muffled by one of the remaining clothing pieces left on the floor.

Kento finds Fuma’s mobile in the inner pocket of his leather jacket after he picks it up from the floor. However he’s too distracted by something else falling out of the jacket to care for the ringing electronic device.

„Is that my phone?“, Fuma asks after he sits Bonita back down on the floor so she can eat in peace and not wet his entire face with her tongue. When he walks over to a crouching Kento his face turns pale upon seeing what Kento is holding in his hands.

A little see-through plastic bag containing many colourful pills inside. Kento just stares at it unsure of how he should react to the newest discovery falling out of Fuma’s jacket.

„It’s not what you think it is“, Fuma says and laughs it off like he usually does when he wants to get himself out of a troublesome situation.

„What the hell, Fuma?!“, Kento screeches and holds the little plastic bag right in front of his nose as if looking at it more closely is going to bring him more certainty. „You’re taking drugs?! Seriously?“

„I’m not, you have to believe me that.“

„I’m not dumb. I have seen pills like that going around on campus“, he scoffs, waving the bag in front of Fuma now. „I might not study chemistry but I can recognise ecstasy pills when I see them.“

„I wasn’t going to deny that, you’re right. But I don’t take them myself“, Fuma replies in a calm tone but what he says next only seems to anger Kento even further. „I only sell them.“

„You sell drugs?! Are you out of your mind?“

Fuma gets annoyed quickly especially when someone hysterical as Kento thinks they know everything better. At least that’s the image Kento gives off currently.

„Listen, I-...“

„This is not the Fuma I saved back then“, Kento spits. „Who really _are_ you?!“

Fuma has had enough of Kento’s temper and grabs the bag of pills out of Kento’s hands but only to snatch it away from him so he can grab both his wrists and push him to the nearest wall to shut him up.

Kento’s back meets the wall next to his balcony in a swift but powerful motion and Fuma’s grip is so hard Kento feels his wrists turn sore and has no chance of fighting back. He almost feels a little humiliated having Fuma overpower him so easily.

„I told you to listen“, Fuma repeats calmly and Kento stares directly into his dark eyes. „Please.“

Their faces are only mere centimetres apart and Kento is confused and scared at the same time, not sure if this is the position he wants to be in again. His heart hammers against his chest like crazy and he swallows hard because the more he waits the more nervous he becomes.

Fuma seems to notice that by the frightened look in Kento’s eyes and instantly softens up.

„I’m sorry, I didn’t want to hurt you“, Fuma mumbles and his grip around Kento’s wrists becomes looser. „But I swear it’s not as bad as you think. It’s easily earned money, you know? There’s nothing besides that.“

„So you’re too lazy to get a real job?“

„God damn it, Nakajima“, Fuma raises his voice slightly. „Not everyone’s life is as easy as your own! I didn’t have the chance to have a normal childhood like you did. I didn’t even go to High School like you.“

„...You don’t even have a High School diploma?“ Kento’s jaw drops and he isn’t even sure what to expect coming out of Fuma’s mouth anymore. „That’s still not an excuse to do illegal things. Do you know how dangerous that is?!“

„I don’t need _you_ to tell me about what’s dangerous and what’s not.“

Kento stares at him for a second then decides to gather all his strength and push Fuma off himself, who then stumbles a few steps back. He feels like he is stuck with a stranger again and he doesn’t even know if he wants to know who the Fuma in front of him really is.

„I don’t know what kind of gang you’re affiliated to but I have a really bad feeling about all of this“, Kento says and his voice suddenly turns a pitch higher, something he always does automatically when he’s about to have a panic attack.

He quickly gathers Fuma’s jacket and his jeans and shoves them into the younger’s chest. „I need you to get out. Like, right now.“

„What?“

Now it’s Fuma who looks at him like a deer caught in headlights but before he can say anything else Kento is already dragging him towards the entrance door.

„I said I want you to leave“, Kento repeats himself and Fuma flinches, doesn’t even have a chance to dress up properly. „Leave!“

As soon as a bewildered Fuma is out the door Kento shuts it close behind him, sliding down to the floor as his breathing finally slows down a little and his hands stop shaking.

Kento’s situation turns out worse than the worst case scenario in his head turned out to be. Way worse.

Fuma’s words still run through his head over and over no matter how hard he closes his eyes or clutches his ears. Fuma’s touches from last night. His gentle voice.

That voice he has never been able to forget.

Kento doesn’t know if he really wants to get to know the real Fuma but at the same time he feels guilty for throwing him out just like that. Something inside of his righteous heart tells him that he cannot give up on him that easily. Not again.

Maybe it has all been a wild dream or a flicker of his imagination and Kento is going to wake up any second. Curled up on his couch Kento clutches his favourite blanket with Fuma’s scent still lingering around.

Maybe he needs a little bit more time to solve all the mysteries of his heart.

Kento cannot believe he spent his night with a drug dealer.


	3. Chapter 3

                                                              

 

 

 

After spending the whole day at his apartment and starving himself, Kento grabs some leftover food from the fridge for a quick bite to satisfy his rumbling stomach before he heads out.

The cold air out hits him in the face like the memory of last morning. Fuma’s smell still lingering on the fabric of his shirt.

_Maybe I was too harsh on him._

Kento doesn’t know how to bring his thoughts back in order. He feels like his whole world turned upside down all of a sudden. Only because of a stupid forgotten crush.

Before Kento can stop his chain of thoughts he realises his feet brought him back to the place he met his disaster. The club he met Fuma at again.

During the day the place by the pier doesn’t even look as mysterious and pretty as it did during the night. All the lights are off and the three storey building looks rather shabby than fabulous, old wooden planks covering some of the broken windows.

Upon entering the club, Kento expects it to be closed but he’s surprised as the doorknob turns in his hand. There’s only a little daylight coming in through the small windows by the ceiling and a faint humming coming from the back area of the open space.

„We’re closed until 10PM“, a female voice says and Kento turns around.

„Oh, it’s pretty boy from last night.“ She smiles at Kento and he awkwardly reciprocates the smile with a slight nod.

Kento recognises the girl who introduced herself as Reina the night before. She looks less rebellious than the last time he has seen her, her light brown dyed hair is tied in a messy bun and she’s wearing shorts and an over-sized t-shirt deciphering a rock band’s logo, holding a broom in her hands.

„Are you looking for something?“, she asks again and tilts her head cutely. „...Or someone?“

Kento halts for another second and lets his hand go through his hair before he answers. „Uhm, do you know about Kikuchi’s-...“

„Ah, Fuma! I think he’s in his apartment. It’s right outside on the second storey of the building. You can use the emergency exit here and climb the staircase to get to it.“

Before Kento continues his journey he halts again. „Can I ask you something else too?“

„Of course! What is it?“, Reina asks and crosses her hands on the broom handle before leaning her head on it.

„What is your relationship with Kikuchi?“

Reina looks at him in surprise and a tint of pink colours her round cheeks. „I work here and Fuma is a frequent performer at this club. We’re just friends. Why?“

Although Reina’s answer sounds sincere to Kento’s ears he can’t help but feel a wave of jealousy overcome him. She did call him by his first name after all, just like that. He knows nothing about Fuma’s friends or his past relationships. Neither does Fuma know about his. He feels like they’re complete strangers again, knowing nothing about each other.

„Do you...“, Kento steps closer as if he’s scared of the police jumping out of any corner, lowering his voice as he continues. „Do you know if Fuma is taking drugs?“

Reina chuckles, relieved that Kento seems to be interested in something else entirely and not her private life. „What type of drugs?“

„That’s not funny“, Kento retorts almost immediately. „I don’t know what type of drugs exactly. Illegal ones. Like ecstasy.“

„No... The only thing Fuma is addicted to is his motorbike. I’ve never seen him take any drugs“, Reina replies and leans back in relief. „What he does to earn money, that is something you should ask him yourself though. At least you know where he lives now.“

Reina winks at him and walks back to continue cleaning. Kento doesn’t know if he likes her witty way of talking or not. It suits her and she would be a great match to Fuma but that is not his main concern now.

Kento thanks her quickly and she waves goodbye when Kento exits the room again just to find himself on a squeaky, metal staircase that leads him to a small entrance door next to a window with rusty bars.

He takes a deep breath and knocks on the door after he realises there is no door bell. The place looks quite rundown in general and Kento wonders if this is really the place he’s supposed to be. There’s so many other things he could be doing at this very moment but instead he’s wasting his time running after hopeless dreams.

When he gets no reply and there’s no trace of Fuma around, Kento tries turning the door knob and to his surprise the door opens by itself, almost like he’s been invited to step inside.

Kento peaks his head in. The apartment is actually smaller than what he expected. The windows on the other side are half barricaded with old wooden planks and dusty curtains. There’s a small unused kitchen in the corner and empty take-away food boxes everywhere on the floor along with empty energy drink cans. In the middle of the room is a messy futon laid out on the floor, looking like either Fuma is too lazy to make his bed or he just woke up.

Kento flinches when he hears Fuma’s faint voice coming from the bathroom. He’s humming a song while in the shower, the melody that’s stuck in Kento’s head and Fuma’s beautiful voice making the tune come into reality.

_Let our darkness lead us into the light._

Trying to get away from it and shake his feelings off Kento crouches down in front of a book shelf with nothing but biker magazines and old notes. He moves the notes to the side and is surprised to find something more interesting underneath.

A photograph of them together from when they were kids.

Young Kento is laughing into the camera posing from his best angle while Fuma looks laid-back and unimpressed as ever, trying to appear cooler than he was back then. Their faces are so close to each other and Kento wonders why Fuma has kept this picture after all this time.

Before Kento is able to put the picture back under the messy papers, he screams in shock when suddenly one strong arm wraps tightly around his neck and pulls him backwards so he almost falls over into his attacker’s arms.

„...What are you doing here?“, Fuma asks with a low voice as he still has Kento firmly in his hold, his biceps almost cutting of Kento’s airways and making him gasp for air.

He feels drops of water fall from Fuma’s wet hair onto his hot cheeks and Fuma’s naked upper body press against his back.

„Can you let go of me first?!“, Kento protest and coughs as soon as he’s released, not having expected Fuma to sneak up on him like that and scare him for dear life.

„I thought you were an intruder“, Fuma replies and finally lets go of Kento, leaving the older to catch his breath as he turns around to face him. „Sorry.“

„I... I didn’t come here to apologise, just so you know“, Kento says with a pant and takes a step back in Fuma’s already small apartment so he can have more space between them. „I’m still mad at you, especially now that you almost choked me to death.“

„Don’t be so dramatic“, Fuma says with a small grin.

Kento doesn’t want to stare but it’s distracting when Fuma stands in front of him half-naked and only in his boxers and a towel around his neck. It’s not the first time after all so Kento wonders why it affects him so much seeing Fuma in this state.

„So why are you here?“, Fuma asks genuinely after Kento doesn’t manage to bring out another word from his lips.

Kento opens his mouth to reply but nothing comes out.

„I- I just-...“

When Kento finally starts talking and takes another step back he stumbles over an empty can lying on the floor and trips, falling right back onto the hard futon on the floor.

Fuma’s first reflex is to grab for Kento to hinder him from falling but they were too far apart so instead of helping, Kento only drags him to fall down right onto his own body, their faces almost crashing with each other before Fuma can prop himself up.

„...You already came back for more?“, Fuma chuckles when Kento only stares at him with wide eyes and a beet red face, unable to move nor say anything.

Only when Fuma’s fingertips gently touch his cheeks and trace down Kento’s neck to his collarbone, Kento remembers he didn’t come back to play and suddenly snaps back to reality.

„No!“, he shouts and finally pushes Fuma off of him. „It’s not my fault your place looks like a rubbish dump.“

„Well, who even told you about my place?“

„Your girlfriend.“

„Reina?“

„So you admit she’s your girlfriend?!“, Kento retorts angrily, pushing himself back up on his feet.

„No, but she’s the only girl who knows about my place. It’s her apartment, she lets me rent it for cheap.“

„So you’re not only selling drugs but also prostituting yourself?“, Kento says in a mocking tone as he’s looking down to Fuma.

„Why the hell do you always assume the worst of me?“, Fuma snorts and gets up from the floor as well. „I’m pretty sure you’re not as pure and innocent as a lamb either. Oh wait. I think you have already proven to be the opposite to me last night.“

Kento rolls his eyes, trying his best to ignore Fuma’s sexual innuendo.

„I’m not but I’m not like you either.“

From one second to the other Fuma switches to a more serious tone as he continues trying to save what’s left of his and Kento’s relation.

„Look Nakajima, please listen to me. I know it’s hard to get inside your pretty head but I’m doing this because I love you. Don’t just go and make it even harder. I only want to protect you.“

Kento stares at him for a good moment. Something about the tone in Fuma’s voice tells Kento that he’s sincere and he needs him there. Another side, the reasonable side in Kento tells him he’s going to get himself in trouble if he trusts his guts once again.

Who do you listen to when you do not know what to do?

_Can I trust you?_

„...do you say this to everyone you manage to wrap around your little finger?“

„I’m serious. I can’t explain it to you yet but trust me. Everything is happening for a reason.“

„Coming here was a mistake.“ Kento turns away, heading towards the door. Fuma doesn’t go after him. There’s no use in forcing someone to stay.

_Can I trust you to love me wholeheartedly?_

 

 

~~~~~

 

If there was a better way of distraction than getting his head lost in his sociology books as he’s studying for his upcoming exams, Kento would probably do it. But for now that is his number one priority. No more adventures and no more socialising. He’s done and back to his ordinary life.

„How many unicorns do you think are there in the sky?“, Shori asks as he’s balancing a ballpoint pen between his nose and his upper lip, sitting across Kento.

„Yes“, Kento replies, not even looking up from his textbook.

Only when Shori lets his pen fall down on purpose, creating a short loud noise on the metallic table, that’s when Kento looks up to him instinctively.

„You’re not listening to me at all. Which cloud are you on?“, Shori mocks and props his head on his arm.

They are sitting in one of the empty study rooms next to the university library, it’s long past getting late and dark outside and Shori has eaten all of his study snacks by now, leaving empty candy wrapping next to them on their table in between a bunch of heavy text- and notebooks.

„Definitely not cloud nine“, Kento replies instantly and beats Shori to his lame tease.

„You looked pretty happy the last time I interrupted you and your new old boyfriend in the morning“, Shori says and folds his arms in front of him.

„He’s not my boyfriend.“

„Well then, your lover. Whatever. Usually you talk so much but now you’re not going to tell me anything?“

„There isn’t anything to tell because there isn’t anything, period. It was a one time fling.“

Shori tilts his head cutely. „Then why are you so moody lately?“

Kento heaves a deep sigh before he answers. „I’m not. I’m trying to concentrate on studying, that’s all.“

„Whatever you say, I won’t force you to talk. Although I’m curious“, Shori says and licks his lips as he leans back into his chair, then grabs his books and shoves them into his backpack. „But I think that’s enough studying for me, I’m heading back home before my work shift starts.“

Kento watches him get up and fumble in one of the back pockets of his sweat pants in search of something, then sees him pulling out a lollipop and easily removing the wrapping paper before stuffing the candy into his mouth.

„I’ll stay here for a little longer, I need to get through a few more pages.“

„Okay. But don’t overwork yourself, some sleep would do you good too“, Shori says with the lollipop pressed into the inside of his cheeks as he excuses himself and leaves Kento to his own company.

Kento knows he shouldn’t spend another night on campus keeping his books company but it’s the only way he feels good without beating himself up for not doing anything regarding Fuma. Not this time. He won’t play hero for anyone but himself.

But this time he feels there is no comfort in comfort.

Before Kento continues staring at his textbooks he decides to pack up an hour later as well and take a walk on campus before going home and trying to sleep early.

When he leaves the building it’s already dark outside and there aren’t many people left roaming around, the usually packed and noisy environment is almost completely silent except for the leaves rustling in the wind.

„Hey!“, a voice calls out and Kento turns around instantly, seeing two senior guys approach him who he recognises as members of the social studies department committee. „You’re Nakajima Kento, right?“

„Yes?“

One of the guys steps closer until he’s only mere centimetres apart from Kento.

„You need to stop going to disgusting places if you want to keep being part of our faculty. You’re quite popular and it’s damaging our reputation if people see you there.“

„...huh?“

„Are you deaf, pretty boy?“, the other guy says in a mocking tone. „He said you should watch out who you’re hanging out with. Someone saw you in that club called Moonlight. We don’t want our students to be affiliated with gangs or even the yakuza.“

„...that’s what you’re worried about?“, Kento releases a short laughter. „Whoever told you they saw me, I went there by accident so don’t worry about our faculties' reputation.“

When Kento wants to walk past by them, hugging his books tight to his chest and his heart pounding with nervousness, one of the guys stretch their legs out on purpose and Kento trips and falls down right onto his face, his books flying in front of him and getting dirtied in soil.

„Also, watch out where you’re going“, the first and taller guy says. „All the girls would get sad if something where to happen to your handsome face.“

The other guy, his friend, laughs and Kento can hear them high-five each other behind him.

Before Kento can feel any kind of humiliation inside and sweat gush out of his skin they’re interrupted. Suddenly there is another voice making themselves prominent right in front of him.

„And who do you think you fuckers are that allows you to treat other people like this?“

A very familiar raspy voice. Fuma.

„We didn’t do anything, he tripped by himself“, guy number one immediately defends himself. „And who are you to meddle into other people’s affairs? I’ve never seen you here before, are you even a student?“

„No, but I’m someone who doesn’t like people who treat others unfairly“, Fuma replies with a stern face expression.

„Then you have no reason to be on campus. Trespassing for non-students is prohibited during this hour of the day“, the tall guy explains before he throws a quick look at Kento who is still on his knees next to them. „Besides, it’s not like this whore deserved any better.“

Kento finally gets up and before he can react he sees Fuma walk towards the guy in the front and throws an unexpected punch right into his smirking face.

The hit is so hard that the guy tumbles and almost would have fallen onto his back if his friend wasn’t able to catch him. By first instinct he touches where the pain is coming from, his nose, and immediately Kento sees the blood dripping from the guy’s injury.

The guy raises his voice. „Are you out of your-...!?“

Fuma raises his fist to lunge out but Kento jumps onto his back right before he could strike another fatal hit and prevents him from doing any more damage to the two senior students.

„Fuma, stop!“

„...I- I can’t believe you brought a delinquent to our school... You’re done Nakajima Kento!“, the guy curses through his hand and bloody nose and he quickly turns around and walks back inside one of the buildings in quick steps, followed by his worried friend.

Kento just stands there for a while, still having his fingers dug into Fuma’s biceps holding him from behind, slightly leaning his head on Fuma’s back. He has to fathom first what even just happened and how in the world Fuma managed to figure out his whereabouts this quick.

Then he finally manages to bring out words, the first things that come to his mind.

„Are you crazy?!“, he hisses at Fuma in a worried tone. „Using violence out of nowhere for these pricks that didn’t even deserve any kind of attention... And I didn’t even ask for you to save me.“

Kento mumbles the last part, then he lets go of Fuma and as he pronounces these words flashbacks of his fifteen-year-old self hit him, back then when he saved Fuma from his bullies.

 _I didn’t ask to be saved._ It were Fuma’s own words.

„Now we’re even, alright?“, Fuma says with a giggle as he shakes the dust off his hands and puts them in the pockets of his ripped jeans.

„How did you even know which university I attend?“

„I told you I know more about you than you think“, Fuma winks at him and Kento thinks this is the most unreasonable time for his stupid jokes but on the other hand if Fuma is indeed stalking him Kento thinks he doesn’t even want to know it.

„Just kidding. I saw your textbooks the last time I was in your apartment.“

Kento wants to go. Every single cell in his body and mind tell him to turn around and just leave. But there is something else, something so seemingly unimportant but crucial at the same time, that makes him unable to think straight and go on about his ordinary life. Something that got to his head and he isn’t able to shake off just like that. Something he has to hold on to.

Not just Fuma’s unique beautiful voice.

But something Kento can help changing. Fuma’s life.

And more importantly his own.

„I’m not...I’m not scared of you anymore“, Kento stutters with furrowed brows and steps closer, „and I believe you kind of, you’re doing things because you have to.“

Kento cups Fuma’s face with both of his hands to pull him in close and then without a warning, kisses Fuma on the lips.

The darkness around engulfs them and Fuma kisses back, putting his hands down to gently rest on Kento’s hips as the older stands up on tiptoes to be able to kiss him even deeper.

It might be dark for now. But Kento believes every darkness will lead them into the light eventually.

 

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All of my friends who are reading this story have asked where the smut is at so here it is you thirsty mofos :p

                                                               

 

 

 

 

Kento loses track of time whenever he kisses Fuma and everything around him suddenly seems so unimportant, even the fact that they’re still standing in the middle of an university campus and it’s late in the evening.

Only when Fuma carefully parts his lips from Kento’s he opens his eyes and comes back to reality. He sees Fuma look down to his feet with a tint of pink on his cheeks and Kento thinks it’s really cute.

„Let’s “, Kento says in a whisper as he’s holding onto the collar of Fuma’s leather jacket and leaves two fleeting kisses right above his perfectly chiselled jawline. „...go to your place.“

„Huh? Are you sure?“, Fuma asks and looks at Kento with a puzzled face expression. „Your place is much tidier. And closer from here.“

„Yes“, Kento answers with determination in his voice as he leans into Fuma. „I think I can handle another ten minutes without kissing you.“

Fuma rolls his eyes and laughs and leads Kento to where he left his motorbike behind. He hands Kento his second helmet and neither of them say a word as they climb Fuma’s bike and Kento puts his hands around his torso again, holding even tighter than the first time when they ride into the night.

 

~~~~~

 

 

When they arrive at Fuma’s tiny rundown apartmet and Fuma fails to find the string to turn on his ceiling light while their bodies are glued to each other as they’re heavily making out again, Kento almost stumbles over another empty box on the floor, only this time Fuma is too focused on his body to allow him to fall.

As soon as they manage stripping their jackets off each other’s bodies and Fuma throws them to the side he also slightly pushes Kento down by his shoulders, signalising him to get on his futon on the floor all the while he leaves steamy kisses and playful bites all over Kento’s neck.

When Kento feels the soft futon mattress under his back and the weight of Fuma above his body he takes the few seconds of separation as a chance to stare at Fuma’s face right above him as the moonlight from outside is illuminating them.

He is also able to hear loud party music coming from the club around the corner where they met and Kento really could be at a more romantic place at this very moment but all of these details don’t even matter to him anymore. Not when he’s with Fuma.

„Are you okay?“, Fuma asks as Kento is just lying there, not moving an inch.

Kento immediately nods a few times. He doesn’t understand why his heart beats so much faster this time himself. „Of course I’m okay.“

„That’s good. Very good.“

Before Fuma is able to say anything else Kento pulls him in again for a sloppy kiss, feeling Fuma’s tongue against his own and the kissing only deepens.

In the meantime Fuma slides a hand under Kento’s white t-shirt and Kento releases a small whimper for the first time that night, the sudden cold touch of Fuma’s fingertips on his hot skin feeling too good to be true and so he halts, interrupting the kiss.

He doesn’t know what’s going through Fuma’s mind but he is definitely not ready for whatever Fuma has in store.

„You’re totally doing that on purpose, aren’t you?“, Fuma’s sudden deep voice makes Kento’s skin craw instantly.

„Huh?“ Kento is genuinely confused.

„Constantly getting upset with me and then coming back all hot and bothered, wanting to fuck. Then doing it all over again.“

Now Kento is the one who blushes and turns his head away. He hates that in fact Fuma is very well aware of the effect he has on him and his body. He cannot deny that no matter how much he would like to fight it.

„Who’s the one who came back to who this time?“, Kento says in all honesty but it comes off more mockingly than he intends it to be.

„You’re such a brat, Nakajima“, Fuma says with a smirk and grabs Kento’s chin to meet his lustful gaze. „But you’re forgetting who’s in control right now.“

Kento’s mind races with so many things Fuma could do to him but somehow none of his fantasies compare to the real thing. He wants Fuma to do everything and anything to him but at the same time he doesn’t want them to constantly fight anymore either.

As much as Kento wants to deny it he knows how much Fuma’s behaviour turns him on. He is already getting hard just by Fuma grabbing him a little too harshly. And now finally there is nothing standing between himself and Fuma making all of his fantasies come true.

But they don’t need many words to understand what they’re craving for.

Before Kento is able to protest (not that he wants to) Fuma suddenly undoes Kento’s black leather belt, much to Kento’s delight because then finally he can have more action going on, but then he completely takes it off from Kento’s jeans and does something the older doesn’t expect him to.

Fuma firmly grasps Kento’s both wrists with his hands and brings them above Kento’s head to tie them together, fastening the belt nice and tight, just enough to render Kento immobile and leave light bruises afterwards.

Kento doesn’t dare moving his arms from where they’re put, only looks at Fuma with widened and hopeful eyes. He doesn’t know if that’s going to be a really comfortable position but what he knows is that he definitely didn’t see that coming from Fuma’s side. The more he thinks about it though the more it excites him.

Then Fuma moves Kento’s t-shirt up and leans down to take one of his nipples into his mouth, playfully nibbles on it and licks around the hot and sensitive skin, while his left hand has already wandered down to grope Kento’s hard-on through his jeans. He leaves a wet trail with his tongue all the way down until he reaches Kento’s waistline.

„Hard already, hm?“

„Fumaah“, Kento whines in response and instead of complaining it rather sounds as if he has just moaned Fuma’s name instead.

„You are indeed needy“, Fuma hisses with an equally impatient voice and Kento can tell just by the tone of his voice that he’s also hard and barely keeps himself back, only to tease Kento a little more.

Then Fuma yanks Kento’s jeans down easily and helps him get rid of unwanted clothing pieces. Kento starts to struggle, trying to get some kind of friction without being able to use his hands, which is a bad idea because Fuma can easily hold him down as long as he wants to.

When Fuma takes off his own shirt and pants, still hovering above, Kento tries hard not to drool because of Fuma’s perfectly trained body in sight. Not that Fuma has it any easier with Kento exposed right below, his shirt up to his chest with his nipples erect and hands tied above his head, the erection in his red Calvin Klein boxer briefs so hard Fuma can see it leak with pre-cum through the fabric.

Kento is utterly beautiful in Fuma’s eyes as he helplessly lies right under him.

„Red suits you“, Fuma purrs into Kento’s ear when he leans over him to nibble on it. „But what suits you best is when you surrender yourself to me.“

Kento lets out a very erotic moan when Fuma’s hand gropes his shaft roughly and gives it a massage. Even with the smallest touch Fuma sees how much Kento enjoys every tiny little bit.

Fuma’s fingers slide between Kento’s buttocks through the thin fabric of the briefs and Kento twitches when he teases right where Kento wants him to, even if it’s no direct touch. His fingers go in slow circles around Kento’s hole and he continues to massage the sensitive spot as Kento’s breath becomes heavier and he shuts his eyes tightly, throwing his head from one side to the other.

„This is where I’m going to fuck you“, Fuma whispers, almost trying to push his finger in through the undies, making Kento desperately moan for more although he naturally tries to hide the vocal side of him.

„Don’t hold it back. Your slutty moans are actually pretty sexy.“

Fuma then pays heed to Kento’s cock again and fondles it impatiently, the tip showing out of Kento’s briefs and leaking some more.

Finally Fuma frees Kento out of the briefs and moves his hand around the hard shaft, pumping it at an unbelievably slow pace. After a few strokes he rubs the tip with his thumb and this especially seems to drive Kento insane since he immediately starts moving his hips, trying to move in Fuma’s hand to create more friction.

„Fuma-ah-ahhh“, Kento moans and doesn’t even care how lewd it sounds anymore as he throws his head back and bites his luscious lips.

„I’m afraid it doesn’t work like that“, Fuma says teasingly and moves back a little. „First you admit that you’re a little tease and then you get what you want.“

Kento definitely isn’t the type to admit anything, he would rather give up and stay stubborn.

„Be obedient or I’ll stop and leave you like this. You want to be a good boy, don’t you?“

Fuma’s words don’t help him at all they just make him even hornier.

Without Kento even noticing Fuma is able to grab for his tiny bottle of lube that is hidden under his pillow on the right and coats his fingers in the sticky substance before he slides his hand between Kento’s buttocks, pulls a little closer until he’s right at Kento’s twitching hole. He slowly pushes a finger in and Kento lets out another whimper, immediately trying to suppress the pain. Soon another finger follows and Fuma continues to move two of his fingers deep into Kento. It seems to work almost perfectly fine since Kento doesn’t protest the least, his wimpy moaning is almost like music to Fuma’s ears.

But this time Kento knows Fuma could do this forever and there is no other solution than to finally put his pride aside and listen to Fuma. And somewhere hidden inside of him it turns him on so much hearing Fuma’s deep, commanding voice. There is some masochistic tendency in him after all.

„Okay I admit, I am a tease“, Kento mumbles against his skin, burying his nose in his arm as strands of hair stick to the sweat on his forehead. He doesn’t have to look but he feels Fuma’s gaze pierce through him.

Fuma feels a wave of triumph roll through his body and grins to himself. This is definitely his victory.

„What was that?“

„Stop it“, Kento whines and thrashes around in Fuma’s hold, trying to get more of Fuma inside of him. „Stop being mean. Do you really need to hear me say I want you to fuck me?“

Kento is already impatient and needy enough and if Fuma hesitates for even longer he is sure he’s not going to last.

„Alright, alright“, Fuma ruffles Kento’s hair before he slides his own boxers down, their bodies so close that Kento can feel Fuma’s hard-on poke at his entrance.

Fuma completely yanks down Kento’s briefs as well, watching his perfect butt for a moment before he slides a condom over his own cock and positions himself in between Kento’s spread legs, slowly pushing the head inside of him.

As much as Kento is in need, Fuma is too, but he takes a moment to let Kento adjust to his size and the foreign feeling inside of him before he pushes in deeper with a careful but firm thrust.

Kento stops breathing for a moment, the feeling of being filled up so pleasurable and so overwhelming that Fuma can’t wait any longer either so he roughly pushes his whole shaft in.

„Aah, fuck!“, Kento hisses, instinctively trying to free his hands but he is still tied up, leaving full control of him to Fuma.

Fuma grabs Kento’s hips and starts moving rapidly over and over again trying to reach a certain spot inside of Kento. He cannot slow down anymore, his pace only becoming faster as Kento becomes louder. It’s like with every following thrust Kento’s voice springs an octave higher and he curses Fuma for seducing him that easily.

„You take my cock so well“, Fuma groans and Kento’s own dick twitches at the comment, wanting to be touched so badly. „Fucking you feels so damn good.“

Kento is a whimpering mess underneath him and he screams every time Fuma hits his special spot.

Fuma cannot really think straight but he remembers Kento’s hands are tied up so he takes Kento’s cock with his free hand and starts jerking him off. They both believe they’re seeing stars when waves of pleasure hit them over and over again.

Fuma makes Kento come before him, Kento finding himself unable to hold back any longer. He hates his own body for reacting this quick but also loves it at the same time. Fuma doesn’t last much longer either, he gives Kento a few strong, hard thrusts before he pulls out, throws the condom to the side and pumps his own shaft to release on Kento’s chest, a few drops landing on Kento’s beet-red face.

After removing the belt from Kento’s wrists, Fuma rolls next to Kento onto the futon, throws a blanket over their bare bodies and stares at the ceiling for a moment, only the sound of their heavy breathing accompanying them in the room. Then he rummages around the floor until he finds his tissue box, takes one out and gently wipes Kento’s face clean.

Kento only closes his eyes shut and smiles because of Fuma’s cute ministrations and as soon as he’s done Kento snuggles up against Fuma’s body.

„Can I ask you something?“, Kento purrs against Fuma’s broad, warm chest.

„What?“, Fuma asks as his fingertips trace the moles on Kento’s arm. „It’s late, we should sleep.“

„What is that song you always hum when you’re with me? I remember it from eight years ago.“

Fuma laughs. That was the least thing he expects Kento to ask. „It’s nothing, really. I just love singing. I made it up in my head while I was looking out for someone I like.“

Kento wants to continue asking but he finds himself drifting off to sleep quicker than he wants to. Thanks to Fuma’s warmth and his beautiful soothing voice. Fuma hums the melody again as he quietly sings to Kento.

Suddenly it is so silent and Kento even blocks out the party music coming from outside.

_Anywhere, anytime,_

_I would do anything for you._

There’s only him and Fuma.

_I’m looking out for you tonight._

   
 

~~~~~

 

 

When next morning arrives Kento wakes up much earlier than Fuma who has peacefully slept right next to him the entire night. Kento guesses it’s because he isn’t used to sleeping on the floor that much.

As the morning sun is illuminating Fuma’s beautiful face features now, Kento having watched him sleep for longer than he should have, he shakes his head and gets up, determined to change Fuma’s life by cleaning the mess in his apartment.

Kento makes sure not to make too much noise as he takes a quick shower and gets back into his regular clothes before taking a proper look at the small room they are in.

He starts with tidying the floor and throwing away all the rubbish so he can finally see the floor underneath. After getting rid of empty cup noodle boxes, old newspaper, random wrapping paper and putting aside random pieces of clothes like socks and t-shirts Kento can confirm there is indeed a nice flooring under all of that.

Then he takes a cleaning rag (that has never been used before) that he finds in one of the kitchen cupboards and makes sure all the shelves are clean and dust-free, before he continues in the kitchen and washes the dishes that are left in the sink. Kento isn’t a master at cleaning and tidying up but he surely knows how to stay organised.

Fuma is still asleep so Kento decides he can do something useful in the meantime and make breakfast from whatever Fuma has left in the fridge.

When he opens the small fridge in the corner he can only find the bare necessities: a few eggs, butter, milk, a few slices of toast. It doesn’t really look like Fuma eats at home that often.

Kento goes with the simplest thing he can think of which are scrambled eggs with toast and some tea to go along with it.

As soon as the butter starts warming over low heat and the sizzling noise of the eggs in the pan becomes louder Fuma finally seems to wake up slowly. Kento sees him from the corner of his eyes.

The food smells good and Kento is happy about how it turns out, thankful his mother taught him the basic skills of preparing simple food while he was still living with his parents. His stomach could do with a delicious breakfast now as well.

„Good morning sleepyhead“, Kento says as he brings the food to the coffee table by the foot of the futon and sits down cross-legged on the opposite side of Fuma, facing him with a smile.

Fuma still looks drowsy when he greets with a simple „Mornin’“ and crawls over to the table to look at the food and then Kento in turns somewhat perplexed, like the food isn’t real and Kento isn’t right in front of him.

„...are you trying to prove to me that you’re housewife material or what?“, he asks half-joking, half-honest. He definitely hasn’t expected Kento to put in _that_ much effort.

„If you think I’d do this for you every day then you’re wrong“, Kento replies and curses himself for not being able to come back with a witty response. „But it looks like you aren’t really taking care of yourself so someone has to do it.“

Fuma smiles to himself looking down at the food in front of him, almost embarrassed by how cute Kento is no matter what he does.

„I guess I’ll just try and see if I can eat it“, Fuma mumbles and starts shoving the scrambled eggs into his mouth like he’s been starving for days.

Kento doesn’t even feel that hungry, he still has so many things he needs to know, so he only watches with a cup of green tea in his hands and smiles at how childish and harmless Fuma can appear at times like this.

„By the way...“, Kento starts, fumbling with the cup in his hands as he puts it back down on the table. „Were you serious when you said that the last time?“

Fuma answers with a full mouth. „That you’re a tease? Yes.“

„No“ Kento chuckles. „When you said that you love me.“

_„But I’m doing this because I love you. Don’t just go and make it even harder. I only want to protect you.“_

Fuma has said those three words to him when Kento went to his apartment for the first time. Kento hasn’t been able to forget them ever since. Fuma’s words and the sincere look in his eyes.

It’s silent for a minute and Fuma puts the fork down onto his plate before he looks up to Kento. The longer he waits the more unsure Kento becomes, the more scared, the more insecure. What if Kento is still only living in his own lovey-dovey fantasy world?

But Fuma brings him right back to reality.

„Yes. I was serious. I love you from the day we met when we were kids.“

Kento can feel his heart almost jump out of his chest and he has to clench his fists to prevent himself from an emotional outburst.

It’s a good outcome. Kento is only this far from his true happiness.

„I hope you know how severe the meaning of these words is, you don’t just say I love you to anyone“, Kento says with a hint of doubt in his voice before he finally finds the courage to be blunt with his feelings as well.

„I love you too, even though I know almost nothing about you anymore. That is why you need to talk to me. If you love someone you trust them, no matter what.“

Fuma only heaves a sigh and it’s silent for another moment. He knows Kento is right and he knew that moment would come sooner or later.

„You’re right. I’ll share my story with you if you’re willing to listen“, Fuma says with a deadly serious face expression. „But it’s not going to be anything you’ll want to hear.“

„I promise I won’t judge“, Kento says with all honesty. „Why don’t you start from the beginning, eight years ago. Why didn’t you go to high school? Where is your family?“

Fuma looks down again as he starts talking.

„My mum and my two younger siblings aren’t here. They moved to the States, to Los Angeles to be exact, after my dad passed away when I was about to start high school. He died in an accident, or at least we were told so, but who knows. I love my family and my dad did everything to protect us but he committed too many mistakes in the end.“

„I’m so sorry to hear about that...“, Kento mutters and suddenly a wave of guilt overcomes him. He doesn’t want Fuma to re-open all of his internal scars just to satisfy Kento’s curiosity and make him understand.

„Then I understand why you had to help your family out at that point and that is very memorable of you but... I’m not too sure I understand it fully.“

Fuma continues. „My dad did things I would never be proud of, he worked with the Yakuza and other illegal underground gangs and sold weapons we probably never even heard of. But he never told his family that he has been in debt for quite some time, he tried to fix it by himself but unfortunately he passed away and so... all the debt he had was transferred to me, his eldest son.“

„What?!“, Kento cannot believe the words he’s hearing. He feels like he’s listening to a movie plot instead of his boyfriend’s family background. And in Japan out of all places. It just feels so surreal to him.

„Are you serious? I mean, this is true? You’re... wait. You’re the son of a Yakuza member and you’re telling me _just now_?“

„Please listen to me... you don’t even know how serious all of this is and it’s exactly why I didn’t want to drag you into it“, Fuma almost whispers as he leans closer to Kento over the table. „I don’t know much about the reasons for the debt, and honestly I don’t even want to, but my dad’s rival gang was betrayed by him and he couldn’t pay them back anymore, therefore they’re after my ass now. If I don’t pay them their money back as fast as possible...“

Fuma moves his index finger, held straight and with palm down, horizontally across his throat, the gesture imitating having his throat slashed with a blade and even though Fuma laughs afterwards Kento doesn’t find it funny at all.

„I can’t believe you’re still making jokes even in a serious situation like this“, Kento scoffs, not amused at all. „You’re not afraid to die?!“

„I’m sorry“, Fuma throws in instantly and his look changes back to stern. „It’s not that I’m not afraid to die. I told you it’s more difficult than I can explain. I didn’t go to high school so I could start working and earning money right away. It wasn’t that easy but it’s doable. I already paid off more than half of the debt.“

„How much is it?“

„Eighty million yen.“

„Eighty million?!“

„I’m not just selling illegal substances to earn cash“, Fuma defends himself. „I also repair motorbikes and perform in clubs, like you’ve seen before. Every job is a good job as long as it brings me money.“

„Yeah, I’ve realised you’re a good singer“, Kento says and folds his arms on the table. „And I know it would be selfish of me to say you should earn your money in a more legal way. I cannot even imagine what you’ve went through and what you’ve seen after all.“

„It would also be selfish of me to say you should get accustomed to my world. That’s why I didn’t want to tell you anything to be honest. The less you know, the better it is for you. You really don’t know what these people are capable of.“

Images of violent Yakuza movies flash through Kento’s mind as Fuma is saying those words. He really does not want to imagine everything Fuma could have seen already.

„If you’re trying to scare me you’re doing a really good job at it“, Kento says with goosebumps all over his body. „But why didn’t you run away and go to the States with the rest of your family? I’m sure Japanese gangs don’t have any ties to Americans.“

Fuma opens his mouth but halts a moment before he answers.

„I have my reasons. But no, you can’t just run away like that. I didn’t ask to be born into this family but I have to fulfil my duties to my dad. I know it would have been his last wish to not start an underground war between different gangs.“

Imagining Fuma being all by himself with such a huge burden all this time, suddenly Kento gets that mushy feeling in the pit of his stomach, he just wants to wrap Fuma in a blanket and protect him from the entire world. But he knows that’s not how the world works. Fuma cannot hide in his room with a fluffy blanket and ice cream in front of his tv for days unlike Kento, who cannot even fathom the world Fuma grew up in.

There’s so many different people in this city. Rich people and poor people. Families, and people who are solo like Kento has been before, only with his small circle of friends living a mundane life not aware of how every other person around him lives in a completely different world with a completely different backstory, yet being so close to each other.

Now that he’s properly thinking about it no matter how much he’s been studying all his life, he doesn’t know anything about the world he lives in.

Kento wants to reach for Fuma’s hand on the table, squeeze it and tell him that everything is going to be okay but he doesn’t dare to for some reason. A moment of insecurity, only a mere second, Kento wishes he would have changed every little moment step by step. Become more self-confident and believe in himself. Believe in him and Fuma.

Until suddenly they are interrupted by a loud knocking on the door.

Fuma springs up from the floor all of a sudden and his gaze wanders to the door instantly. In the next second, it only being a mere second, he looks at a confused Kento with a worried expression, grabs his wrist harshly and pulls him towards the other side of the room.

„Kento please, you have to trust me this time. You have to hide in my wardrobe for a minute. It’s almost empty anways.“

„What...?!“

The knocking on the door only intensifies and Kento doesn’t like the feeling he’s suddenly getting at all.

„Fuma, I’m-...“ Kento wants to say but Fuma shushes him by pressing two of his fingers against Kento’s lips.

„I’ll explain afterwards, quick!“

Before Kento is able to say anything else Fuma is already shoving him inside of his built-in wardrobe and pushing the slide door close, only leaving it slightly ajar so Kento doesn’t suffocate inside.

Kento actually sits quite comfortably on one of Fuma’s oversized sweaters, hiding behind a few hanging shirts, trying to peek through and see what the hell is going on with Fuma and his unwanted guest.

When Fuma finally opens the door Kento can tell by Fuma’s body language he doesn’t want to invite the person in at first but lets him pass by after a short exchange anyways.

As far as Kento can see it’s another guy with dyed blonde hair, around the same height as Fuma but much more intimidating looking. Besides that there’s nothing special about him that Kento would say is easily recognisable. No tattoos or scars or gang logos on the baseball cap he’s wearing. He’s wearing plain clothes, a khaki jacket, jeans and sneakers.

„What are you doing here?“, Fuma says to the guy, obviously someone he knows.

„You know exactly why I’m here“, the guy immediately replies. „You’re slow with the money, my friend. My boss wants double the amount this month.“

„It’s already not that easy getting so much money at once and you want even more?“, Fuma remarks and Kento doesn’t know if Fuma just learnt to be fearless with time or if he’s only pretending not to be scared talking so carelessly to a gang member.

„And I’m definitely not your _friend_.“

Fuma’s opponent clicks his tongue and in one swift move he grabs Fuma by the collar of his t-shirt and pushes him against the closed entrance door, creating a loud thud sound and Kento startles in his hidden spot, covering his own mouth in fear.

He almost stops breathing when he sees the guy grab for something in his back pocket, then holding it firmly against Fuma’s neck. It’s a sharp silver knife, one that people usually use to tear animal flesh open to remove the intestines. One wrong move and that knife could end Fuma’s life.

Kento doesn’t even dare to gulp and Fuma doesn’t move in shock either. Still he doesn’t see fear in Fuma’s eyes. Almost like he was expecting it. Like he knows what the guy is capable of.

„This is my last warning, I don’t have time for jokes. I need the money and if you cannot provide it, you know what’s going to happen“, the guy hisses and finally puts the knife down, removing his hands from Fuma’s neck.

Kento breathes again and wipes off the sweat from his forehead.

„I got it“, Fuma says in an apologetic tone. „Please give me a couple more days. I’ll definitely get it.“

The guy looks around Fuma’s apartment and when he eyes the wardrobe Kento’s heart begins to hammer so fast he thinks everyone in the room can hear it.

Never in his life has he been so scared before.

„I see you had a guest over“, the guy says, finally averts his gaze from the wardrobe and eyes the two plates with leftover food on the coffee table instead. „Seems like you had fun last night, Kikuchi. Make sure you don’t lose track of your job instead.“

The guy pats Fuma on the shoulder one last time before he finds his way out. Before he finally leaves he leans closer to say something to Fuma, which Kento is able to hear loud and clear.

„...you know, or else that Nakajima Kento guy will have to pay instead.“

 

 

 


End file.
